Shodan Test: Done!

So, Saturday happened. For those of you following along, that would be Saturday, October 20th. The day of my shodan test. I suppose my black belt in Kyokushin was also a shodan, but because we didn't observe rank above black belt, it didn't really occur to me to call it that. Also, since we didn't observe the dan system, I wasn't sure what the names of the different dans were. But now I'm hip. And I have a shodan in Seido, which is pretty damn cool. The test was awesome, which is really not a suprise but is good to savor nonethless. I've gushed in various forums already, but what the heck, I'll gush a little bit more here. I am so damn thankful that Sun Dragon exists, and that it's taken the path that it has. It really, truly, makes my life so much better. I know this because I still remember my life pre-Sun Dragon, and not to get too overdramatic about it, but there's really no comparison. It's not a magic pill or a panacea, but it has given me both a wonderful, supportive community and the mental/emotional tools to take better advantage of that community, as well as to just be in the world much more courageously. Oh, and having some modicum of physical prowess is also nice.

Ok, enough of the mush. The test was 5 hours long, which was satisfyingly draining. We were put through our paces starting with basics, and going through self defense, both formal and informal, sparring drills (Yakosokus), kata, and surely lots more than that because that doesn't seem like it could take 5 hours. One of my weaknesses is that I don't tend to remember events, especially emotionally-charged events, all that well. Speaking of emotionally-charged, the test started with an oral portion. During which I cried. I sort of knew I would - I was taken by surprise by my tears at my Sensei's test back in April, but with that experience etched in my memory, I figured it would happen again.

Do I contradict myself? Then I contradict myself. I contain multitudes.

Anyway, yes, I cried, which I don't enjoy because it's embarrassing, and I like to think of myself as being made of sterner stuff. But really I'm a total softie. Which is not entirely bad, I guess, for one's emotional health. Still. I didn't wholly enjoy that part, but at least I was prepared for it.

My mom came to the test, which was good. She'd never seen me train before, much less test. I am not what one would call close to my family (though that's beginning to change a little bit). I think she enjoyed it - she said her favorite part was the board breaking. Oh! There was also a board breaking section. I used a shotei, which is a palm heel (before I started training in the martial arts, it never occurred to me that your palm has a heel just like your foot does). The thing with board breaking is that it's totally a mental thing. Well, not totally, obviously - but the point is that it's not that hard to break a board as long as you commit, but if you go in thinking it's going to hurt or otherwise not sure of your success, you probably won't be able to do it. That also tends to be true with rolling and falling, in my experience. So anyway, when we'd done some breaking in class a couple of weeks prior, I'd had mixed success, mainly because I didn't want to get hurt. This time, though, I sort of figured that it didn't matter if I got hurt, because I was at the test, and if I had an injury afterwards it wasn't that big a deal. Of course, I also knew that I wouldn't hurt myself if I committed, so I wasn't actually scared of it. I was just psyching myself up, but that's how I phrased it in my mind. I broke on the first try, which was gratifying.

There was also a portion where we had to run a gauntlet, with lots of punching and kicking. The gauntlet was made of various karateka holding pads and targets. It wasn't technically hard, since it was free-form, do-whatever-comes-to-mind, but it was perhaps the most tiring section in terms of cardio-vascular demands. It's also the only time I noticed anything MS-related during the test. My left leg started doing its burning/unhappy thing. I grabbed the wall (and at one point, Senpai KJ) to take the weight off of it and let it rest for a few moments, and that subdued it enough that I was able to continue with modifications. So, yay for that.

I could probably go on and on about the test, and might still in future posts, but that's all I'll say for now. The party following was also a bunch of fun. My mom decided not to go, because she didn't particularly feel like being surrounded by people she didn't know, and I can't say I blame her for that. I actually was one of the first to arrive (right around 7) and one of the last to leave (around midnight). That's not all that typical for me, but the people there were just so good to be around, and I felt like celebrating - even if I did a lot of that celebrating sitting down. Rarely has sitting felt so good. It was especially nice to be able to spend time around Sensei Suzanne and Shihan Nancy, since I see both of them rarely - and you know, they kick ass. But it was also just as nice to just be able to hang out with my karateka in a social setting. There used to be more Sun Dragon parties - for a while there, we had pretty much every month covered as far as birthdays went. January was Joy and Mahala, February was Harper, March was Carmel, April was Miriam, May was Beth, June was me. Ok, that's just the first 6 months, after which I guess we all went to bed early until December and KJ's birthday. Now people have moved away, gotten married, stopped training, or otherwise turned boring, for the most part. But I have hope! For Cindy is having a birthday party soon, so maybe this'll start another run (no pressure, Cindy).

Ok, that's all for now.